Characteristics of a Great Marriage

By Pastor Brandon in Thinking About Sunday on 9/14/09

I mentioned during my message on Sunday that I would write a blog that highlighted the characteristics of a great marriage which I teach in pre-marriage counseling. I am sorry it has taken me so long. Please forgive any typos or incomplete sentences. Urgency superseded editing this time around. I am removing all the fluff and sharing a detailed outline instead. I will check the blog post often, so feel free to make comments and ask questions. I will respond right away. Remember, I am for your marriage!

Characteristics of a great marriage include:

1. Time Spent Together
   1. Structured time: vacations, weekends away, regular dates, etc.
   2. Casual time: kitchen chats, bedtime sharing, walks, etc.
2. Spiritual Center
   1. Living life for the purpose of pleasing God will automatically please your spouse. Living life to please self only makes both miserable.
3. Negotiating ability
   1. Listen and respond to each other without defensiveness.
   2. Respect your spouse’s point of view whether you agree or not.
   3. Understanding your spouse’s vantage point or perspective is often more important than agreeing or disagreeing.
4. Maturity
   1. Maturing is predicated on wisdom and experience, not years.
   2. Maturity is measured by:
      1. Humility: admitting error, confessing weakness
      2. Loyalty: honoring your spouse, not exposing them
      3. Perseverance: persistence in the face of difficulty. Commitment.
5. Intimacy
   1. Emotional: desire to meet each other’s felt needs.
   2. Spiritual: growing together in Christ
      1. Attend the same church
      2. Pray together but allow for individuality
      3. Do occasional Bible studies together
      4. Attend marriage enhancement classes
      5. Attend marriage enrichment retreats
   3. Physical: meeting each other’s physical needs

I look forward to reading your thoughts and answering your questions!

I believe in you!

Pastor Brandon

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